I am not a fan of chocolate in the morning. It was baffling to me the first time I tried a chocolate chip muffin, why on earth would I DETEST the concept of dessert for breakfast? I love chocolate any other time of day, I would (and have) eaten Oreos and M&Ms all day long if I could, but there's something about the overly sweet richness in the morning that just turns my stomach.
So when I chose to make these teff muffins this morning, I almost omitted the cocoa powder, thinking I would save myself the heartache of a ruined baking attempt and maybe I just knew what everyone else was missing, that chocolate + muffins = gross.
I was so wrong.
Against my better judgment, I included the cocoa powder. It made the muffins a notch above delicious. It added depth, and a dark tone that balanced out the light sweetness of the banana, like a hint of dark chocolate. You could probably add another tablespoon or two if you want a stronger chocolate flavor.
Teff is an amazing little grain, full of protein, iron and fiber and low in fat. I initially wanted to try it for the fiber and iron, since Brooke has low iron and we can all use more fiber in our diets. I was hesitant though because I had no idea what to expect when it came to taste. The recipe on the package looked harmless, but it used olive oil for the fat, which suggests a savory muffin, i.e. my children won't touch it. I found this recipe and modified it slightly:
http://glutenfreeinslc.blogspot.com/2010/03/banana-teff-muffins.html
The original recipe is from Gluten Free Girl, who is like the Barefoot Contessa of the gluten free cooking scene, meaning her stuff is fresh, seasonal, beautiful food that is a bit more high-brow than my kids are willing to try.
http://glutenfreegirl.com/and-finally-theres-teff/
http://www.teffco.com/index.html
The consistency of these muffins is about like a light bran muffin, but the banana makes it moist, so much so that you won't need to add butter or jam. The recipe makes 18 muffins, so I will have plenty to freeze and reheat for a quick nutritious breakfast or snack. They are surprisingly filling, as well. I ate two with a cuppa tea and am satisfied.
As I write, Kate has eaten one and a half of these! And 3/4 of an early summer peach. And a yogurt. She's like a termite.
Chocolate Banana Teff Muffins
Wet Ingredients
2 large or 3 small ripe bananas, mashed with a fork
1/2 c butter, room temperature
1/2 c sugar
1/2 c brown sugar, packed
2 eggs, room temperature
1 tsp vanilla extract
1/2 cup light sour cream, room temperature (could use yogurt instead, just not fat free)
Dry Ingredients
1 c teff flour (I used Bob's Red Mill)
1/2 c sweet rice flour
1/2 c sorghum flour
1/2 c tapioca flour
1/2 c almond meal
1 tsp cinnamon
1 tsp salt
1 tsp baking soda
1 tsp baking powder
1 tsp xanthan gum
3 Tbsp unsweetened cocoa powder (I used Hershey's)
Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
Prepare two muffin pans with liners or cooking spray. (I did not need to flour the tins, Crisco cooking spray did the trick!)
In a large bowl, combine all dry ingredients and whisk together. Set aside.
In a small bowl, mash the bananas, set aside.
In another large bowl, cream together butter and sugars. When they are just creamed, stop mixing. I used a stand mixer, but this recipe doesn't really demand it.
Add the eggs, vanilla and sour cream and mix, scraping down the sides as needed.
Mix in the mashed bananas on low. When combined, scrape sides and beaters as needed.
Get out your big girl muscles and a rubber spatula. Gradually fold in flour mixture, about 1/4 of a cup at a time, until just combined. At first this will be very easy, but by the last few additions, you will have to put in some effort.
Spoon into prepared muffin tins, about 2/3 full or so. I don't make all of mine uniform because a)I don't work in food service where uniformity is crucial, and b) I like to give Kate and Brooke the smaller muffins and T the bigger ones, I'm weird like that.
Once the batter is spooned into the tins, I tap the bottom of the pans on the counter to get out any large bubbles of trapped air. I don't know if it matters on this recipe, but it's a habit.
Place in the middle of your preheated oven and bake for about 18-20 minutes or until firm and a toothpick comes out clean, it might be a little damp from the moisture of the banana.
Remove from the oven and let cool for about 5 minutes. Enjoy a filling and delicious breakfast!
Saturday, June 4, 2011
Thursday, June 2, 2011
Snack Attack
So the hardest thing about sending your darling child off to preschool/school is not that they don't miss you, or that they come home with new, unsavory words. It's that they are completely off the grid, going rogue, beyond arm's length away from you and your protective Mama Bear swipe. And for those of us who struggle with being in control of everything, we find this very difficult, indeed.
So there's that. Then there is the fact that they have "naptime" and if you are like me and prided yourself on sleep training starting at six weeks or whatever, prepare to have a cranky child who CANNOT sleep on a 1 inch plastic mat on the ground without room darkening shades, white noise machine or ceiling fan blasting on turbo. IT AIN'T GONNA HAPPEN. So at 2 pm, be prepared to pick up this exhausted child, then either drive at breakneck speed home and throw them in bed for a nap that lasts until dinnertime, at which point they will wake up crabby and NOT want to go back to sleep until 1o pm, or just suck it up and keep them up until 7 pm, or as I like to call it, "let's see how many times I can beat my head against the wall."
Then we have snack time. Oh, yes, the whole reason we exist. It is all about the snack. Unless you are my child, then snack time looks like this...
Teacher: "Children, our letter of the day is L and so we are having Lucky Charms!" "Children, our letter for the day is G and so we are having Goldfish!" "Children, our letter of the day is R and so we are having Rice Krispy Squares!" (do you see a pattern here?)
So then teacher hands Kate her GF animal crackers while everyone else gets (fill in the blank, letter appropriate snack.)
NO MORE!
This summer, Kate is attending summer camp at her school, which is basically VBS all summer, which sounds awesome to me. I loved VBS, I think she'll have a blast.
So they made an announcement at the open house last night that they were changing their policy on snacks and would no longer be providing a snack, but instead the parents would need to send one for their child everyday. All the other moms are groaning, "Great, another thing to worry about in the morning." And then there's me, pumping my fist in the air (internally) and feeling extremely relieved.
Kate won't be odd girl out! Hooray! It's the little things, ya know?
So there's that. Then there is the fact that they have "naptime" and if you are like me and prided yourself on sleep training starting at six weeks or whatever, prepare to have a cranky child who CANNOT sleep on a 1 inch plastic mat on the ground without room darkening shades, white noise machine or ceiling fan blasting on turbo. IT AIN'T GONNA HAPPEN. So at 2 pm, be prepared to pick up this exhausted child, then either drive at breakneck speed home and throw them in bed for a nap that lasts until dinnertime, at which point they will wake up crabby and NOT want to go back to sleep until 1o pm, or just suck it up and keep them up until 7 pm, or as I like to call it, "let's see how many times I can beat my head against the wall."
Then we have snack time. Oh, yes, the whole reason we exist. It is all about the snack. Unless you are my child, then snack time looks like this...
Teacher: "Children, our letter of the day is L and so we are having Lucky Charms!" "Children, our letter for the day is G and so we are having Goldfish!" "Children, our letter of the day is R and so we are having Rice Krispy Squares!" (do you see a pattern here?)
So then teacher hands Kate her GF animal crackers while everyone else gets (fill in the blank, letter appropriate snack.)
NO MORE!
This summer, Kate is attending summer camp at her school, which is basically VBS all summer, which sounds awesome to me. I loved VBS, I think she'll have a blast.
So they made an announcement at the open house last night that they were changing their policy on snacks and would no longer be providing a snack, but instead the parents would need to send one for their child everyday. All the other moms are groaning, "Great, another thing to worry about in the morning." And then there's me, pumping my fist in the air (internally) and feeling extremely relieved.
Kate won't be odd girl out! Hooray! It's the little things, ya know?
Thursday, May 26, 2011
Now that I am calmer...
Thanks for all the kind thoughts and words from my post the other day. Kate's teachers are really sweet and supportive, I could not have asked for two more nurturing and kindhearted ladies to introduce Kate to a school setting. I hope she is as blessed next year! The funny thing about me is that I like things my way, so I don't always have an easy time accepting when things don't go so smoothly. But they do have her best interests at heart and have tried to work with us with all the ups and downs of this year.
But when your child is the one with an issue, you cannot assume that everyone is going to react as you are. It is not as important to them as it is to you, because it is your whole life, and maybe just 10% of theirs! These women have raised their own children and taught dozens of other people's kids for years, and maybe they never had an issue like this, but maybe they did. And maybe the way they handled it was by telling their beloved child that they were special and it made that child accept their difference and feel wonderful! But I know my child and I know myself and we always want more of an explanation than "...because, that's why." So Kate and I will continue to battle this, hopefully gently and gracefully, and hope that we encounter more lovely ladies and gentlemen along the way.
Here are the cookies that I made for Kate's end of the year party today. They went into the oven at 8:45 this morning, and again at 11:00 for Brookie and me! This recipe actually originated on the Land O'Lakes website. I modified it a little, adding the xanthan gum to an existing, pretty much identical flour blend instead of making another batch. I also didn't roll them out, I made them refrigerator or slice and bake cookies.
http://www.landolakes.com/recipe/1527/star-cut-out-cookies-gluten-free-recipe
GF Slice and Bake Sugar Cookies
1 c. granulated sugar
1 c. butter, room temp.
2 egg yolks, more or less room temp.
1 1/2 tsp vanilla
2 1/4 c. gf flour blend*
1 tsp xanthan gum
1/4 tsp salt
*GF Flour Blends can vary, which means your results can vary. If you have an all purpose baking blend that you swear by, use it! Just check that there is xanthan gum somewhere in the process and experiment away. The one that I used for this and the cinnamon rolls is a pretty basic and commonly used blend that uses 4 c. brown rice flour, 1 1/3 c potato starch (not flour), and 2/3 c tapioca starch. Put these amounts into a gallon ziploc bag, seal it and give it a good shake. Keep it in the fridge for your next batch.
Add butter and sugar to a large bowl, beat or cream together until, um, creamy. Scrape down the sides at least once. Add egg yolks and vanilla, beat well again, scraping down the sides as needed. Turn the mixer to low, add the flour blend, xanthan gum (if it is not already in your blend!) and salt. Once incorporated, beat well until it looks like cookie dough.
Now, I made these slice and bake because I am not big into the effort of roll cookies except for at Christmas, but if you want to roll them out and use cookie cutters, just cover the bowl and refrigerate for at least an hour or until firm. Then roll out between two sheets of wax or parchment paper to about 1/4 inch thick and cut into whatever shapes you like. Use a little of your flour blend to prevent sticking to the paper/cutters.
If you are a lazy mommy like me, take half of the dough and put it in the center of a 10 or so inch square of plastic wrap (I use Press and Seal), fold it over and squish it into a log, sealing the ends and rolling it into a little tube. Repeat for the other half of the dough. Put one in the fridge and the other in the freezer for the next time you need a sugar cookie on the spot. It will probably keep in the freezer for a couple of months.
But for today, refrigerate the one dough log for at least an hour. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Line a cookie sheet with a piece of parchment paper. When your oven is preheated, take the dough out of the fridge, unwrap it and slice it into about 1/4 inch thick slices. Lay out about an inch or so apart. Bake for 8-10 minutes or until the edges are golden. Let cool until you can't stand it anymore! Each log makes about 18 2 1/2 inch cookies.
They are very buttery and rich, and best when fresh. An excellent cookie with a glass of vanilla almond milk!
But when your child is the one with an issue, you cannot assume that everyone is going to react as you are. It is not as important to them as it is to you, because it is your whole life, and maybe just 10% of theirs! These women have raised their own children and taught dozens of other people's kids for years, and maybe they never had an issue like this, but maybe they did. And maybe the way they handled it was by telling their beloved child that they were special and it made that child accept their difference and feel wonderful! But I know my child and I know myself and we always want more of an explanation than "...because, that's why." So Kate and I will continue to battle this, hopefully gently and gracefully, and hope that we encounter more lovely ladies and gentlemen along the way.
Here are the cookies that I made for Kate's end of the year party today. They went into the oven at 8:45 this morning, and again at 11:00 for Brookie and me! This recipe actually originated on the Land O'Lakes website. I modified it a little, adding the xanthan gum to an existing, pretty much identical flour blend instead of making another batch. I also didn't roll them out, I made them refrigerator or slice and bake cookies.
http://www.landolakes.com/recipe/1527/star-cut-out-cookies-gluten-free-recipe
GF Slice and Bake Sugar Cookies
1 c. granulated sugar
1 c. butter, room temp.
2 egg yolks, more or less room temp.
1 1/2 tsp vanilla
2 1/4 c. gf flour blend*
1 tsp xanthan gum
1/4 tsp salt
*GF Flour Blends can vary, which means your results can vary. If you have an all purpose baking blend that you swear by, use it! Just check that there is xanthan gum somewhere in the process and experiment away. The one that I used for this and the cinnamon rolls is a pretty basic and commonly used blend that uses 4 c. brown rice flour, 1 1/3 c potato starch (not flour), and 2/3 c tapioca starch. Put these amounts into a gallon ziploc bag, seal it and give it a good shake. Keep it in the fridge for your next batch.
Add butter and sugar to a large bowl, beat or cream together until, um, creamy. Scrape down the sides at least once. Add egg yolks and vanilla, beat well again, scraping down the sides as needed. Turn the mixer to low, add the flour blend, xanthan gum (if it is not already in your blend!) and salt. Once incorporated, beat well until it looks like cookie dough.
Now, I made these slice and bake because I am not big into the effort of roll cookies except for at Christmas, but if you want to roll them out and use cookie cutters, just cover the bowl and refrigerate for at least an hour or until firm. Then roll out between two sheets of wax or parchment paper to about 1/4 inch thick and cut into whatever shapes you like. Use a little of your flour blend to prevent sticking to the paper/cutters.
If you are a lazy mommy like me, take half of the dough and put it in the center of a 10 or so inch square of plastic wrap (I use Press and Seal), fold it over and squish it into a log, sealing the ends and rolling it into a little tube. Repeat for the other half of the dough. Put one in the fridge and the other in the freezer for the next time you need a sugar cookie on the spot. It will probably keep in the freezer for a couple of months.
But for today, refrigerate the one dough log for at least an hour. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Line a cookie sheet with a piece of parchment paper. When your oven is preheated, take the dough out of the fridge, unwrap it and slice it into about 1/4 inch thick slices. Lay out about an inch or so apart. Bake for 8-10 minutes or until the edges are golden. Let cool until you can't stand it anymore! Each log makes about 18 2 1/2 inch cookies.
They are very buttery and rich, and best when fresh. An excellent cookie with a glass of vanilla almond milk!
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
Adventures in the Frozen Section
I have a mini rant brewing, that if given the chance would become a full blown tantrum. So I'm going to get it off my chest in hopes that it will subside.
I. Am. Frustrated.
I specifically asked my child's preschool teacher at the time of Kate's diagnosis to please let me know ahead of time if there were any special treats planned so that I could accommodate her. I didn't ask for special treatment, just a heads up.
I am usually the last mom to pick up in the afternoon, so I usually get a minute to visit with the teachers, giving them plenty of opportunity to notify me of upcoming events. They send home backpacks everyday, so they could send a note. And they have my home and cell numbers if they want to call.
There has been ONE time that they have given me advanced notice, meaning not the morning of, but the day before, that a special snack is needed. Otherwise, I walk in at 9:13 and am told that they will be having a (insert snack here) at 9:45.
I. Am. Frustrated.
There are several grocery stores within 10 minutes of the school, and I have run out and back in time once, only because they had a fire drill and that bought me a few extra minutes, but still. I try to be prepared, and when I don't have notice, I am not prepared. And who suffers? MY THREE YEAR OLD WHO CAN'T DO A HELL OF A LOT ABOUT IT!!!!
Urrrrggh.
So this morning, I am told that the snack for Thursday will be an Eskimo Pie and a sugar cookie. Which is a lot of sugar for a gaggle of three and four year olds, but that is beside the point. Sort of. But as it turns out, the Eskimo Pie was supposed to be a "science experiment" for today, but they decided not to do it because they didn't give notice to the parents with children with dietary restrictions. And the sugar cookie is a "reward" to be given after their little "graduation" program. Which reinforces food as reward for a job done. Right?
I digress. So I drive to the HEB and find these super yummy dairy and gluten free Eskimo Pie-ish treats made with coconut milk and agave sugar. And I have plenty of recipes for sugar cookies, no big whoop.
I go pick up Kate and tell her teachers that "Yay, Kate will be included in the snack on Thursday, I found her some GF Eskimo Pie thingie!" To which they respond, "Oh, well they actually decided to do ice cream sandwiches instead."
Wha wahhhh.
Totally different story. Now I am not appreciative of the heads up, I am irked.
And they're like, oh, she can just have the one you bought and the other kids will have ice cream sandwiches! Which kinda defeats the purpose of the heads up! I know it's similar but it's not the same and I don't want Kate to always always always feel different!
So they tell me to tell her she's special or that her food is special and that's why she gets something else. Which is not really what I think we should be telling her. I know she's special, but not because of her Celiac. And is her baby sister not special because she's not Celiac?
She has a different diet because she has Celiac disease.
She's special because she is smart and strong and sassy and sweet all at the same time. She's special because she is a strong swimmer and has an elephant's memory and is super tall and my beautiful, tender hearted child. She's special because she loves loves loves her sister and Jesus and taught herself how to take pictures with my iPhone just this very morning.
And I believe that it is a big deal and it is not a big deal at the same time, and we are still muddling through it, and I appreciate all the support we can get. It's not bad to be different, but it can be really hard. And I can just hear her in about 10 years saying, "Mo-om! Stop telling me it's because I'm special! I just want an OREO!"
So that is my little rant/tantrum.
In other news, I made amazing GF cinnamon rolls for my family last weekend, I am going to try to make them again and freeze half of the batch. I found the recipe on The Baking Beauties blog. She has some really delicious stuff cooking up over there.
http://www.thebakingbeauties.com/2011/01/best-gluten-free-cinnamon-buns-or-rolls.html
I used my brother-in-crime Matt's recipe for the frosting:
4 oz cream cheese
1/4 c butter
1/2 tsp vanilla
1/2 Tbsp milk
1 1/2 c powdered sugar
1/2 tsp cinnamon
Beat the cream cheese and butter together until creamy and smooth, then beat in the milk and vanilla, beat until smooth, add the powdered sugar and cinnamon, beat until smooth. If it is too stiff, add more milk about a teaspoon at a time. If it is too thin, add more powdered sugar a tablespoon at a time until the desired consistency. Refrigerate until ready to use.
You will not regret making these. Honestly, they were way better than the canned rolls and were as good if not better than the ones Matt makes with wheat flour. They took me about an hour of work, not counting time to rise, but they were incredible! I made them on Saturday night and put them in the fridge for breakfast on Sunday, and it made an entire 9x13 pan full of cinnamon glory, with leftovers for Monday, as well. And you only use half of a box of pudding mix, so you can fold that puppy up and put it in the fridge for next time.
Thanks for listening to my little rant, friends. To sum it up, I stopped at Kroger on the way home and spent $7.50 on four GF ice cream sandwiches. So as much as I feel like they had better be amazingly good at almost $2 a piece, if Kate is happy and included, they are worth every penny to me.
I. Am. Frustrated.
I specifically asked my child's preschool teacher at the time of Kate's diagnosis to please let me know ahead of time if there were any special treats planned so that I could accommodate her. I didn't ask for special treatment, just a heads up.
I am usually the last mom to pick up in the afternoon, so I usually get a minute to visit with the teachers, giving them plenty of opportunity to notify me of upcoming events. They send home backpacks everyday, so they could send a note. And they have my home and cell numbers if they want to call.
There has been ONE time that they have given me advanced notice, meaning not the morning of, but the day before, that a special snack is needed. Otherwise, I walk in at 9:13 and am told that they will be having a (insert snack here) at 9:45.
I. Am. Frustrated.
There are several grocery stores within 10 minutes of the school, and I have run out and back in time once, only because they had a fire drill and that bought me a few extra minutes, but still. I try to be prepared, and when I don't have notice, I am not prepared. And who suffers? MY THREE YEAR OLD WHO CAN'T DO A HELL OF A LOT ABOUT IT!!!!
Urrrrggh.
So this morning, I am told that the snack for Thursday will be an Eskimo Pie and a sugar cookie. Which is a lot of sugar for a gaggle of three and four year olds, but that is beside the point. Sort of. But as it turns out, the Eskimo Pie was supposed to be a "science experiment" for today, but they decided not to do it because they didn't give notice to the parents with children with dietary restrictions. And the sugar cookie is a "reward" to be given after their little "graduation" program. Which reinforces food as reward for a job done. Right?
I digress. So I drive to the HEB and find these super yummy dairy and gluten free Eskimo Pie-ish treats made with coconut milk and agave sugar. And I have plenty of recipes for sugar cookies, no big whoop.
I go pick up Kate and tell her teachers that "Yay, Kate will be included in the snack on Thursday, I found her some GF Eskimo Pie thingie!" To which they respond, "Oh, well they actually decided to do ice cream sandwiches instead."
Wha wahhhh.
Totally different story. Now I am not appreciative of the heads up, I am irked.
And they're like, oh, she can just have the one you bought and the other kids will have ice cream sandwiches! Which kinda defeats the purpose of the heads up! I know it's similar but it's not the same and I don't want Kate to always always always feel different!
So they tell me to tell her she's special or that her food is special and that's why she gets something else. Which is not really what I think we should be telling her. I know she's special, but not because of her Celiac. And is her baby sister not special because she's not Celiac?
She has a different diet because she has Celiac disease.
She's special because she is smart and strong and sassy and sweet all at the same time. She's special because she is a strong swimmer and has an elephant's memory and is super tall and my beautiful, tender hearted child. She's special because she loves loves loves her sister and Jesus and taught herself how to take pictures with my iPhone just this very morning.
And I believe that it is a big deal and it is not a big deal at the same time, and we are still muddling through it, and I appreciate all the support we can get. It's not bad to be different, but it can be really hard. And I can just hear her in about 10 years saying, "Mo-om! Stop telling me it's because I'm special! I just want an OREO!"
So that is my little rant/tantrum.
In other news, I made amazing GF cinnamon rolls for my family last weekend, I am going to try to make them again and freeze half of the batch. I found the recipe on The Baking Beauties blog. She has some really delicious stuff cooking up over there.
http://www.thebakingbeauties.com/2011/01/best-gluten-free-cinnamon-buns-or-rolls.html
I used my brother-in-crime Matt's recipe for the frosting:
4 oz cream cheese
1/4 c butter
1/2 tsp vanilla
1/2 Tbsp milk
1 1/2 c powdered sugar
1/2 tsp cinnamon
Beat the cream cheese and butter together until creamy and smooth, then beat in the milk and vanilla, beat until smooth, add the powdered sugar and cinnamon, beat until smooth. If it is too stiff, add more milk about a teaspoon at a time. If it is too thin, add more powdered sugar a tablespoon at a time until the desired consistency. Refrigerate until ready to use.
You will not regret making these. Honestly, they were way better than the canned rolls and were as good if not better than the ones Matt makes with wheat flour. They took me about an hour of work, not counting time to rise, but they were incredible! I made them on Saturday night and put them in the fridge for breakfast on Sunday, and it made an entire 9x13 pan full of cinnamon glory, with leftovers for Monday, as well. And you only use half of a box of pudding mix, so you can fold that puppy up and put it in the fridge for next time.
Thanks for listening to my little rant, friends. To sum it up, I stopped at Kroger on the way home and spent $7.50 on four GF ice cream sandwiches. So as much as I feel like they had better be amazingly good at almost $2 a piece, if Kate is happy and included, they are worth every penny to me.
Monday, April 25, 2011
Easter Weekend and the Attack of the Horrible GF Bread
Tonight for dinner, I rotisseried (is that even a word?) a chicken in my rotisserie oven from Heather and Matt, and made a delicious asparagus-spinach risotto. It was divine, but I dirtied half the dishes in my kitchen and all of the available countertops, so I am putting off cleaning my kitchen, hence the new blog post.
We had all of my in-laws in town for Easter, which included T's parents, his only sister, her husband and their three boys. We had a great, mostly stress free weekend, and just truly enjoyed each others' company.
I was coming down off the high of a couple of successful GF baking attempts, and with a traditional ham dinner for Easter Sunday on the docket, I decided to make GF "dinner rolls."
Quotation marks are because they looked like biscuits and tasted like something I would feed the dogs. Oh, wow, they were horrible.
They didn't taste like anything I had ever had before. I can't even truly describe how bad they were, my sister in law said they tasted like a tennis shoe.
My brother in law walked into the kitchen to snag one as they were cooling and was trying really hard not to show his disgust, the nice man that he is. But even though we warned him, T put on his game face and ate one on Sunday because he is my wonderful husband. 95% of the meals I put in front of him are delicious, so he remained loyal even during this experimental GF stage.
I didn't take any of this personally because even though I was honestly slaving in the kitchen over them, I thought they were pretty bad, too.
I also made GF "cinnamon rolls," which I am putting in quotation marks because they had more of a cinnamon roll inspired brioche-thing going on. Jill and I made these on Saturday night for Easter morning, because cinnamon rolls used to be our Sunday morning staple prior to Kate's CD diagnosis. Kate, one nephew and the adults all liked it, Brookie and the two older boys did not. 2 out of 3 ain't bad! I will probably try a different recipe next time though, because for the amount of work I put in, they weren't amazing.
The oatmeal cookies were a hit and amazingly there were a few left on Sunday, so T got to have one after his Lenten fast from sweets was broken. Such dedication to his personal sacrifice! I tempted him a lot with desserts over the last 40 plus days, just call me Eve.
I also made Brazilian Cheese Rolls, or pao de queijo, which are traditionally made with tapioca flour and are gluten free. The texture reminds me of the sausage balls you make with Bisquick, cheese and Jimmy Dean sausage, crunchy on the outside, and soft and springy on the inside. The recipe is one that you can play around with, using different herbs and cheeses and they are really easy to make. I will definitely be making those again. The first time I made them, I shaped them to be about the size of my palm, this time they were much smaller, about the size of a plum. I think somewhere in between will be perfect.
On Saturday, we took family pictures with Jill and her family, me, T and the girls, and my in-laws. We hired the photographer who took our Christmas pictures, my friend and hairstylist Amy came over and did our hair and makeup, (ooh la la!) and we all did the white shirts and blue jeans thing. I was really worried that it would look boring, but it didn't at all! The girls wore white sundresses and looked adorable, I will share the link to Deanna's blog when she posts them.
That's really all, it was a low drama weekend, which I am very grateful for. So today I am thankful for:
- Living in a country where I am free to worship God and celebrate the resurrection of his Son, Jesus Christ.
- Family and friends
- On the Border corn tortilla chips being sold in a huge bag at Sam's and being gluten free!
Okay, here I go into domestic bliss!
We had all of my in-laws in town for Easter, which included T's parents, his only sister, her husband and their three boys. We had a great, mostly stress free weekend, and just truly enjoyed each others' company.
I was coming down off the high of a couple of successful GF baking attempts, and with a traditional ham dinner for Easter Sunday on the docket, I decided to make GF "dinner rolls."
Quotation marks are because they looked like biscuits and tasted like something I would feed the dogs. Oh, wow, they were horrible.
They didn't taste like anything I had ever had before. I can't even truly describe how bad they were, my sister in law said they tasted like a tennis shoe.
My brother in law walked into the kitchen to snag one as they were cooling and was trying really hard not to show his disgust, the nice man that he is. But even though we warned him, T put on his game face and ate one on Sunday because he is my wonderful husband. 95% of the meals I put in front of him are delicious, so he remained loyal even during this experimental GF stage.
I didn't take any of this personally because even though I was honestly slaving in the kitchen over them, I thought they were pretty bad, too.
I also made GF "cinnamon rolls," which I am putting in quotation marks because they had more of a cinnamon roll inspired brioche-thing going on. Jill and I made these on Saturday night for Easter morning, because cinnamon rolls used to be our Sunday morning staple prior to Kate's CD diagnosis. Kate, one nephew and the adults all liked it, Brookie and the two older boys did not. 2 out of 3 ain't bad! I will probably try a different recipe next time though, because for the amount of work I put in, they weren't amazing.
The oatmeal cookies were a hit and amazingly there were a few left on Sunday, so T got to have one after his Lenten fast from sweets was broken. Such dedication to his personal sacrifice! I tempted him a lot with desserts over the last 40 plus days, just call me Eve.
I also made Brazilian Cheese Rolls, or pao de queijo, which are traditionally made with tapioca flour and are gluten free. The texture reminds me of the sausage balls you make with Bisquick, cheese and Jimmy Dean sausage, crunchy on the outside, and soft and springy on the inside. The recipe is one that you can play around with, using different herbs and cheeses and they are really easy to make. I will definitely be making those again. The first time I made them, I shaped them to be about the size of my palm, this time they were much smaller, about the size of a plum. I think somewhere in between will be perfect.
On Saturday, we took family pictures with Jill and her family, me, T and the girls, and my in-laws. We hired the photographer who took our Christmas pictures, my friend and hairstylist Amy came over and did our hair and makeup, (ooh la la!) and we all did the white shirts and blue jeans thing. I was really worried that it would look boring, but it didn't at all! The girls wore white sundresses and looked adorable, I will share the link to Deanna's blog when she posts them.
That's really all, it was a low drama weekend, which I am very grateful for. So today I am thankful for:
- Living in a country where I am free to worship God and celebrate the resurrection of his Son, Jesus Christ.
- Family and friends
- On the Border corn tortilla chips being sold in a huge bag at Sam's and being gluten free!
Okay, here I go into domestic bliss!
Thursday, April 21, 2011
C is for Cookie, that's good enough for me, Yeah!
This weekend I have all of T's family coming in for Easter, and I am scrambling for bread replacement recipes. I still need to find a recipe for sandwich rolls, but I am a dessert girl, so that's where I started.
Today I attempted to make my great-grandmother's Oatmeal Raisin Cookie recipe gluten free. Guess what? They are great!
I started out making these egg-free this past spring, partly because the little girl down the street was allergic and partly because I was out of eggs that day. They turned out really good, and it made me so happy that Jilly was able to eat them, especially since when she came to our house for Brooke's "Milk and Cookies" birthday party, she wasn't able to eat anything. My sister in law jumped into the pantry and ended up with a Cascadian Farms granola bar. Hostess with the mostest!
So making cookies for kids is kinda my thing. I love having fresh baked cookies for the girls and usually share them with my friends' families so that we don't eat them all, and also because there's just something about made-from-scratch, homemade cookies that is so comforting. My mom made these for us growing up pretty regularly, so maybe that's why they taste so good. Knowing that my sweet Great Grandma Brown made these for her family makes them even better to me.
Great Grandma was my mother's beloved grandmother, and she was, I believe, 4 foot 11, and as kind and loving as can be. She passed away when I was a junior in high school, but I can still hear her Canadian accented voice calling my mother "Pet." According to my mother, she used to hoard toilet paper and never learned how to drive. She loved my mother dearly and went to bat for her as a little girl when she would do something to make my great grandfather angry, like play in the yard and bend the blades of grass. For real. God Bless his soul, some men like things just so, don't they?
I'm sure they are not a secret recipe, she probably got it off the Crisco package since it calls for Crisco oil, but since she is gone, we are going to credit her!
Great Grandma Brown's Oatmeal-Raisin Cookies (Gluten, Dairy and Egg free)
1 c. Gluten Free All purpose flour *
1/4 tsp. xanthan gum
1 tsp. gluten free baking powder
1/2 tsp. baking soda
1/2 tsp. salt
Dash of cinnamon
3/4 c. brown sugar, packed
2/3 c. Crisco oil (I use store brand Canola oil, I'm a rule breaker!)
1 tsp. pure vanilla (can add another 1/2 tsp. if you are using a beany all purpose flour)
1 Tbsp. flax meal
3 Tbsp. lukewarm water
1 1/4 c. Certified Gluten Free Oats (I used Bob's Red Mill GF Rolled Oats)
1/2 c. raisins
Preheat your oven to 325 degrees. Line two baking sheets with parchment paper. Position racks in the oven so they are evenly spaced.
In a small bowl, place flax meal and lukewarm water, let sit for at least five minutes.
In a medium bowl, combine the first five ingredients and whisk together. Set aside.
In a large mixing bowl, (I use my stand mixer for this) combine brown sugar, oil and vanilla, then add flax meal/water combination, beat well.
Turn speed down, and add dry ingredients 1/2 cup at a time until all of mix is in, then turn the mixer speed up to medium and let it go for about two or three minutes.
Turn the speed down to low and add raisins, then oats. Stir until combined.
Using a small spoon, drop by rounded spoonfuls onto prepared baking sheets about two inches apart.
Bake for about 8-10 minutes, then remove from the oven and cool on the baking sheet. Enjoy warm and think of my Great Gram!
*The flour blend I used contained 1 cup each of white rice, sorghum, tapioca and almond flours, plus 1 cup of cornstarch. Mix all the flours together with a whisk and use 1:1 in place of all purpose wheat flour. I got the recipe from The Gluten-Free Bible, published by Publications International, Ltd. I like it because it doesn't use bean flour, which is more nutritious but tastes funky to me in cookies.
Because of the almond flour, this recipe is not nut free, but to do that, you could change the almond flour to coconut flour in the same proportion, or switch the flour blend to one that does not include almonds. Then this recipe would be pretty much allergen free!
Today I attempted to make my great-grandmother's Oatmeal Raisin Cookie recipe gluten free. Guess what? They are great!
I started out making these egg-free this past spring, partly because the little girl down the street was allergic and partly because I was out of eggs that day. They turned out really good, and it made me so happy that Jilly was able to eat them, especially since when she came to our house for Brooke's "Milk and Cookies" birthday party, she wasn't able to eat anything. My sister in law jumped into the pantry and ended up with a Cascadian Farms granola bar. Hostess with the mostest!
So making cookies for kids is kinda my thing. I love having fresh baked cookies for the girls and usually share them with my friends' families so that we don't eat them all, and also because there's just something about made-from-scratch, homemade cookies that is so comforting. My mom made these for us growing up pretty regularly, so maybe that's why they taste so good. Knowing that my sweet Great Grandma Brown made these for her family makes them even better to me.
Great Grandma was my mother's beloved grandmother, and she was, I believe, 4 foot 11, and as kind and loving as can be. She passed away when I was a junior in high school, but I can still hear her Canadian accented voice calling my mother "Pet." According to my mother, she used to hoard toilet paper and never learned how to drive. She loved my mother dearly and went to bat for her as a little girl when she would do something to make my great grandfather angry, like play in the yard and bend the blades of grass. For real. God Bless his soul, some men like things just so, don't they?
I'm sure they are not a secret recipe, she probably got it off the Crisco package since it calls for Crisco oil, but since she is gone, we are going to credit her!
Great Grandma Brown's Oatmeal-Raisin Cookies (Gluten, Dairy and Egg free)
1 c. Gluten Free All purpose flour *
1/4 tsp. xanthan gum
1 tsp. gluten free baking powder
1/2 tsp. baking soda
1/2 tsp. salt
Dash of cinnamon
3/4 c. brown sugar, packed
2/3 c. Crisco oil (I use store brand Canola oil, I'm a rule breaker!)
1 tsp. pure vanilla (can add another 1/2 tsp. if you are using a beany all purpose flour)
1 Tbsp. flax meal
3 Tbsp. lukewarm water
1 1/4 c. Certified Gluten Free Oats (I used Bob's Red Mill GF Rolled Oats)
1/2 c. raisins
Preheat your oven to 325 degrees. Line two baking sheets with parchment paper. Position racks in the oven so they are evenly spaced.
In a small bowl, place flax meal and lukewarm water, let sit for at least five minutes.
In a medium bowl, combine the first five ingredients and whisk together. Set aside.
In a large mixing bowl, (I use my stand mixer for this) combine brown sugar, oil and vanilla, then add flax meal/water combination, beat well.
Turn speed down, and add dry ingredients 1/2 cup at a time until all of mix is in, then turn the mixer speed up to medium and let it go for about two or three minutes.
Turn the speed down to low and add raisins, then oats. Stir until combined.
Using a small spoon, drop by rounded spoonfuls onto prepared baking sheets about two inches apart.
Bake for about 8-10 minutes, then remove from the oven and cool on the baking sheet. Enjoy warm and think of my Great Gram!
*The flour blend I used contained 1 cup each of white rice, sorghum, tapioca and almond flours, plus 1 cup of cornstarch. Mix all the flours together with a whisk and use 1:1 in place of all purpose wheat flour. I got the recipe from The Gluten-Free Bible, published by Publications International, Ltd. I like it because it doesn't use bean flour, which is more nutritious but tastes funky to me in cookies.
Because of the almond flour, this recipe is not nut free, but to do that, you could change the almond flour to coconut flour in the same proportion, or switch the flour blend to one that does not include almonds. Then this recipe would be pretty much allergen free!
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
Absence makes the heart grow fonder.
I think that if motherhood is a test, I'm pulling in a B-. I have so much to learn, but I know enough of the basics to wing it most days. It's kinda like college, I find myself struggling the most when I choose not to plan ahead, and breezing through on the days that I am prepared. You would think that I would learn my lesson and always pick out clothes and pack lunch the night before, but do I? Nope.
However, nothing could have prepared me for what we have been dealing with over the last month or so.
Kate has had an "angry tummy" since she contracted giardia (a nasty parasite common in swimming pools, shopping carts, dirt, etc.) last summer. She was sick enough that she was losing weight, lethargic, and scaring her momma big time. We ended up switching pediatricians over the whole thing, because our former ped would not perform a stool sample, (poop in a bowl) saying that even if it was giardia, it was "self-limiting" and that it would resolve itself. In his opinion, it was a virus. Shocker.
The next day, she had a dentist appointment where they took her vitals and her weight had gotten down to 29 lbs, which meant her total weight loss was around 11% of her body weight, and I started panicking, worst case scenario style.
I called around and got her in with a new pediatrician, Dr. Ramsey, who took us seriously and ordered the stool sample, got her on the hardcore antibiotic...no more giardia, good as new, right?
Except Kate never really got back to normal. Her tummy always hurt, her "throw up" (throat) hurt, she was alternating between diarrhea, constipation, bloated, flat tummy, irritable, happy, fatigued, energetic, hungry and full. We chalked it up to the terrific three's and Dr. Ramsey called it "postviral gastroparesis," or indigestion caused by an infection. She put her on Prevacid for the reflux (she would have random vomiting episodes, as well) and Miralax for the poo issues. She ordered an abdominal x-ray, which showed Kate to be full of you-know-what, and prescribed enemas and suppositories to clean her out. Now it was labeled "chronic constipation."
Well, I was not really happy about my child taking two longterm medications at the age of three and a half, so I tried increasing her fiber, giving her more whole wheat items, oatmeal, prunes, raisins, etc. It didn't seem to matter what I fed her, she never had two days the same. And every night, she told us her tummy hurt.
It got to the point that she had a preference between two types of glycerin suppositories because one was less uncomfortable than the other, and she would ask for Mylanta before bed every night.
I felt like something was wrong, and none of what we were doing was solving the problem or even really treating the symptoms.
Meanwhile, my own stomach was giving me grief. I have had heartburn off and on since I was pregnant with Brooke, and it started acting up more frequently during all of this. My doctor had me start taking Prilosec, then increased to a double dose when the single dose stopped helping. I had an upper GI performed, which was absolutely horrible. But a story for another day!
Anyway, everything appeared normal, and at my follow up appointment, she changed my PPI to a prescription and asked me if I or anyone in my family had ever been tested for Celiac disease. My answer was no, I have only known one person ever with it, he lived across from me in high school and I think I may have spoken three words to him in my life.
So she said she wanted to test me the next time I came in for bloodwork in June, and I headed home to, of course, scour the internet for info on Celiac disease.
And it all described my baby girl's ailments.
So the following week, Kate had a follow up, and I asked Dr. Ramsey to do the blood test for Celiac disease. She was not convinced that it wasn't "garden variety chronic constipation," but she tested her, probably just to appease me, since I'm pretty sure that between my two girls, we have paid for her summer vacation this year.
A week later, I called the office, and they told me that Kate's results were in and they were high, so I needed to make an appointment with a pediatric gastroenterologist.
What?!
Me- "What does that mean, the results are high?" Nurse- "Well, it means that you need to see the gastroenterologist."
Thanks for the info. So I called the man, Dr. Villa, and I got an appointment for the next afternoon. I'm thinking this guy must be top notch if I have an appointment in less than 24 hours. That doesn't even happen at the car dealership.
So we went, and I answered all the questions about Kate's diet, her medical history, my medical history, T's medical history, and that of every family member I can think of who has ever had a significant medical problem. Then we saw Dr. Villa.
He was very good with Kate, not too pushy, and felt around on her belly for a minute, which made her laugh because it tickled.
Then he told me that her antibody levels indicated Celiac disease, with her chances of having it being in the 90's. I was floored, I could not believe that my child, who came from my own body, could have this and not even I could tell. I went through all the stages of grief right there in his office in about thirty seconds, to which he responded that this was not a bad disease.
(I KNOW THAT! IT'S NOT CANCER, OR AUTISM OR ANYTHING LIFE THREATENING BUT I AM TERRIFIED AND MY CHILD IS SICK SO GIVE ME A BREAK!) - Internal Rant
Then I took my beautiful girl home, and two days later, Dr. Villa performed an endoscopy on her under general anesthesia and took biopsies from her esophagus, stomach and small intestine. Our friend and priest, Rich, came and sat with us, providing comic relief and prayer, which is a great combination. Meanwhile, T's mother drove in to keep Brooke for us, and we had many prayerful women from the Daughters of the King praying for Kate and her doctors. I can't speak for Tommy, but I felt at peace. I had no anxiety, Kate was charming all the nurses, and when she woke up, she looked around and asked where the doctor was, then wanted to go home and eat. Dr. Villa said her tissues looked normal, but we would have to wait for the biopsy results to be sure.
The following Wednesday, or one week ago today, we went back to Dr. Villa's and were told that the biopsies confirmed that it was Celiac disease, and the only treatment is a 100% gluten free diet. Gluten is everywhere in almost everything. T was in Brazil for the week, my brain felt like it was in the washing machine, and so my reaction was to drive over to Whole Foods and wander around. At 11:30 am. With two hungry, tired and cranky toddlers.
So I spent $80 on 10 items, then came home, made mock flour tortilla quesadillas, put the girls in bed and purged my pantry. I also had some crying spells thrown in here and there, driving, sitting, laughing and then crying. I felt like a crazy person.
I know it's not the end of the world, and I know it's not a death sentence. But in a way it is. Kate will never have a carefree existence. She will always have to prepare and plan ahead, I will always have to prepare and plan ahead, which we have already determined, is NOT my strong suit.
The absolutely fabulous news is, we will be much healthier, savvier consumers, since Kate being gluten free means that the rest of the family will be mostly gluten free as well in order to protect her little intestines from being attacked. Eating gluten free means reading every label on every item you purchase and bring into your home, so you are much more conscious of what you are putting in your body.
It also means very little eating out since the only way to be sure of your food's safety is to prepare it yourself. Which means me. In the kitchen. Three meals a day. Downside, lots of dirty dishes. Upside, new cookbooks and recipes, some of my guilty pleasures!!
I gave myself a full 24 hours to grieve, then got busy figuring things out. I emailed a college friend whose daughter is also Celiac, had a great conversation with her and immediately felt less isolated. I also decided not to Facebook and blog and spill to the world about this until I was ready to deal with questions or well meaning and sometimes irritating comments.
We haven't "told" Kate anything, I've told her that she can only eat what Mommy and Daddy give her, and when she wants something she can't have, we've told her that the food in question will make her tummy hurt. Which is not something she wants! So far, she has done great, she eats whatever we give her for the most part, and has only told us a couple of times that her tummy hurts. Her preschool teachers have been awesome, letting me know what snack is at school so that I can bring Kate a healthy alternative, and following my directions for preparation. The next test will be Easter weekend when we have family coming in and we will be going out to eat!
So here's where I am today.
1. Don't take no for an answer when it comes to your child's health. It is your job and your right as the parent to ask questions and expect great care.
2. If you feel like something is not right, it probably isn't.
3. Circle the wagons. Decide who needs to know and who doesn't and keep it that way until the family is ready to share. My decision was based on T being basically incommunicado and respecting that he needed his vacation more than I needed the heartfelt sympathy of Facebook nation.
4. Planning and preparing are tools for success! I was always able to wing it and succeed until I had two children and a laundry list of responsibilities. That is one positive to come out of all of this, but not the only one.
5. Know that if your child has a disease or disorder, you need to become as much of an expert as you can, because you are their only advocate, and no one else is going to make informed decisions for them but you. The nurses at the doctor's office, the dietitian, even the friends whose children have the same issue, not one of them knows your child like you, and as long as your child is small, it is up to you to direct their care.
6. It's better to know than to wonder.
The next step is having the rest of our family tested. Brooke had her blood drawn last week and we are waiting on the results. T and I have to have our blood drawn, which will include the antibody panel and the genetic screen. Pray that Brooke's levels are low and she will not have to undergo the endoscopy. Pray for patience for me while I navigate through this transition. Pray for the healing of Kate's body and that we can continue to see the upside in all of this.
Stay tuned for fun with GF cooking!
UPDATE* Dr. Ramsey's office just called and Brooke's bloodwork came back normal! Hallelujah!
However, nothing could have prepared me for what we have been dealing with over the last month or so.
Kate has had an "angry tummy" since she contracted giardia (a nasty parasite common in swimming pools, shopping carts, dirt, etc.) last summer. She was sick enough that she was losing weight, lethargic, and scaring her momma big time. We ended up switching pediatricians over the whole thing, because our former ped would not perform a stool sample, (poop in a bowl) saying that even if it was giardia, it was "self-limiting" and that it would resolve itself. In his opinion, it was a virus. Shocker.
The next day, she had a dentist appointment where they took her vitals and her weight had gotten down to 29 lbs, which meant her total weight loss was around 11% of her body weight, and I started panicking, worst case scenario style.
I called around and got her in with a new pediatrician, Dr. Ramsey, who took us seriously and ordered the stool sample, got her on the hardcore antibiotic...no more giardia, good as new, right?
Except Kate never really got back to normal. Her tummy always hurt, her "throw up" (throat) hurt, she was alternating between diarrhea, constipation, bloated, flat tummy, irritable, happy, fatigued, energetic, hungry and full. We chalked it up to the terrific three's and Dr. Ramsey called it "postviral gastroparesis," or indigestion caused by an infection. She put her on Prevacid for the reflux (she would have random vomiting episodes, as well) and Miralax for the poo issues. She ordered an abdominal x-ray, which showed Kate to be full of you-know-what, and prescribed enemas and suppositories to clean her out. Now it was labeled "chronic constipation."
Well, I was not really happy about my child taking two longterm medications at the age of three and a half, so I tried increasing her fiber, giving her more whole wheat items, oatmeal, prunes, raisins, etc. It didn't seem to matter what I fed her, she never had two days the same. And every night, she told us her tummy hurt.
It got to the point that she had a preference between two types of glycerin suppositories because one was less uncomfortable than the other, and she would ask for Mylanta before bed every night.
I felt like something was wrong, and none of what we were doing was solving the problem or even really treating the symptoms.
Meanwhile, my own stomach was giving me grief. I have had heartburn off and on since I was pregnant with Brooke, and it started acting up more frequently during all of this. My doctor had me start taking Prilosec, then increased to a double dose when the single dose stopped helping. I had an upper GI performed, which was absolutely horrible. But a story for another day!
Anyway, everything appeared normal, and at my follow up appointment, she changed my PPI to a prescription and asked me if I or anyone in my family had ever been tested for Celiac disease. My answer was no, I have only known one person ever with it, he lived across from me in high school and I think I may have spoken three words to him in my life.
So she said she wanted to test me the next time I came in for bloodwork in June, and I headed home to, of course, scour the internet for info on Celiac disease.
And it all described my baby girl's ailments.
So the following week, Kate had a follow up, and I asked Dr. Ramsey to do the blood test for Celiac disease. She was not convinced that it wasn't "garden variety chronic constipation," but she tested her, probably just to appease me, since I'm pretty sure that between my two girls, we have paid for her summer vacation this year.
A week later, I called the office, and they told me that Kate's results were in and they were high, so I needed to make an appointment with a pediatric gastroenterologist.
What?!
Me- "What does that mean, the results are high?" Nurse- "Well, it means that you need to see the gastroenterologist."
Thanks for the info. So I called the man, Dr. Villa, and I got an appointment for the next afternoon. I'm thinking this guy must be top notch if I have an appointment in less than 24 hours. That doesn't even happen at the car dealership.
So we went, and I answered all the questions about Kate's diet, her medical history, my medical history, T's medical history, and that of every family member I can think of who has ever had a significant medical problem. Then we saw Dr. Villa.
He was very good with Kate, not too pushy, and felt around on her belly for a minute, which made her laugh because it tickled.
Then he told me that her antibody levels indicated Celiac disease, with her chances of having it being in the 90's. I was floored, I could not believe that my child, who came from my own body, could have this and not even I could tell. I went through all the stages of grief right there in his office in about thirty seconds, to which he responded that this was not a bad disease.
(I KNOW THAT! IT'S NOT CANCER, OR AUTISM OR ANYTHING LIFE THREATENING BUT I AM TERRIFIED AND MY CHILD IS SICK SO GIVE ME A BREAK!) - Internal Rant
Then I took my beautiful girl home, and two days later, Dr. Villa performed an endoscopy on her under general anesthesia and took biopsies from her esophagus, stomach and small intestine. Our friend and priest, Rich, came and sat with us, providing comic relief and prayer, which is a great combination. Meanwhile, T's mother drove in to keep Brooke for us, and we had many prayerful women from the Daughters of the King praying for Kate and her doctors. I can't speak for Tommy, but I felt at peace. I had no anxiety, Kate was charming all the nurses, and when she woke up, she looked around and asked where the doctor was, then wanted to go home and eat. Dr. Villa said her tissues looked normal, but we would have to wait for the biopsy results to be sure.
The following Wednesday, or one week ago today, we went back to Dr. Villa's and were told that the biopsies confirmed that it was Celiac disease, and the only treatment is a 100% gluten free diet. Gluten is everywhere in almost everything. T was in Brazil for the week, my brain felt like it was in the washing machine, and so my reaction was to drive over to Whole Foods and wander around. At 11:30 am. With two hungry, tired and cranky toddlers.
So I spent $80 on 10 items, then came home, made mock flour tortilla quesadillas, put the girls in bed and purged my pantry. I also had some crying spells thrown in here and there, driving, sitting, laughing and then crying. I felt like a crazy person.
I know it's not the end of the world, and I know it's not a death sentence. But in a way it is. Kate will never have a carefree existence. She will always have to prepare and plan ahead, I will always have to prepare and plan ahead, which we have already determined, is NOT my strong suit.
The absolutely fabulous news is, we will be much healthier, savvier consumers, since Kate being gluten free means that the rest of the family will be mostly gluten free as well in order to protect her little intestines from being attacked. Eating gluten free means reading every label on every item you purchase and bring into your home, so you are much more conscious of what you are putting in your body.
It also means very little eating out since the only way to be sure of your food's safety is to prepare it yourself. Which means me. In the kitchen. Three meals a day. Downside, lots of dirty dishes. Upside, new cookbooks and recipes, some of my guilty pleasures!!
I gave myself a full 24 hours to grieve, then got busy figuring things out. I emailed a college friend whose daughter is also Celiac, had a great conversation with her and immediately felt less isolated. I also decided not to Facebook and blog and spill to the world about this until I was ready to deal with questions or well meaning and sometimes irritating comments.
We haven't "told" Kate anything, I've told her that she can only eat what Mommy and Daddy give her, and when she wants something she can't have, we've told her that the food in question will make her tummy hurt. Which is not something she wants! So far, she has done great, she eats whatever we give her for the most part, and has only told us a couple of times that her tummy hurts. Her preschool teachers have been awesome, letting me know what snack is at school so that I can bring Kate a healthy alternative, and following my directions for preparation. The next test will be Easter weekend when we have family coming in and we will be going out to eat!
So here's where I am today.
1. Don't take no for an answer when it comes to your child's health. It is your job and your right as the parent to ask questions and expect great care.
2. If you feel like something is not right, it probably isn't.
3. Circle the wagons. Decide who needs to know and who doesn't and keep it that way until the family is ready to share. My decision was based on T being basically incommunicado and respecting that he needed his vacation more than I needed the heartfelt sympathy of Facebook nation.
4. Planning and preparing are tools for success! I was always able to wing it and succeed until I had two children and a laundry list of responsibilities. That is one positive to come out of all of this, but not the only one.
5. Know that if your child has a disease or disorder, you need to become as much of an expert as you can, because you are their only advocate, and no one else is going to make informed decisions for them but you. The nurses at the doctor's office, the dietitian, even the friends whose children have the same issue, not one of them knows your child like you, and as long as your child is small, it is up to you to direct their care.
6. It's better to know than to wonder.
The next step is having the rest of our family tested. Brooke had her blood drawn last week and we are waiting on the results. T and I have to have our blood drawn, which will include the antibody panel and the genetic screen. Pray that Brooke's levels are low and she will not have to undergo the endoscopy. Pray for patience for me while I navigate through this transition. Pray for the healing of Kate's body and that we can continue to see the upside in all of this.
Stay tuned for fun with GF cooking!
UPDATE* Dr. Ramsey's office just called and Brooke's bloodwork came back normal! Hallelujah!
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